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Oh, Those Lights!
10 Perfect Gifts for Your Soul
By G-d

1Listen up ladies, our hottest gift, “The Friday Lights,” was specially designed for women and girls (ages 3 and up), and will bring peace and harmony to any home. So grab a match and light candles every Friday afternoon, at least 18 minutes before sunset, and let your soul enjoy a Shabbat of total relaxation. Repeat weekly, and of course, before Jewish Festivals.

2 This gift comes perfectly wrapped and is already custom-made for any guy (ages 13 and up). All you’ll need is a kosher pair of Tefillin (black leather boxes containing small parchment scrolls). Every morning, unwrap the gift and treat your soul to a moment of “Teffillin Therapy.” You may notice that your soul will smile frequently during these sessions. This gift only comes in black and should not be used on Shabbat or Festivals.

3 Let your soul feel safe and secure with the perfect housewarming gift, the “mezuzah.” The gift should be installed on the doorposts of every Jewish home and office. The “mezuzah” is a sign that the area is Heaven-Conscious and enjoys His protection. Don’t be surprised if your soul kisses this gift, that’s totally normal. The “mezuzah” is handmade from all natural materials. Please note: installation is not included.

4 This thoughtful gift was designed to really get your soul thinking, so why not surprise her with the “Study of Torah Daily?” Even just a few lines of Torah contain the infinite wisdom of G-d. Make it a habit and see what you’ll learn about yourself.

5 Make your soul feel like a million-bucks, and give her the gift of “Tzedakah.” This simple yet useful gift brings happiness to your soul and, more important, a poor family living nearby. The best way to give this gift is to make it a daily surprise. So keep a “pushkah” (charity box) handy in your home and

6 What language does your soul read? English? Hebrew? Spanish? It doesn’t matter; our gift of “Jewish Books in Your Home”comes in all languages. Why not be good to your soul and furnish its living space with as many holy books as possible? At the very least, we suggest you get a hold of a Chumash (Bible), Psalms, and a Prayer Book. (Leather bound set optional.)

7 Keep your soul happy and healthy with our gourmet “Kosher Diet.” Once you eat differently, you’ll notice that your soul won’t seem so metaphysical anymore, but part and parcel of your very being. The “Kosher Diet” will give your soul spiritual results within minutes, and there’s no surgery necessary.

8 All our customers say that they love this next one the most: It’s our most basic gift of “Love Your Fellow as Yourself.” This gift can, and should, be used at any time or place. Reaching out to your fellow man with patience and love is among the greatest gifts you can give any soul.

9 Every soul should receive the gift of “A Jewish Education.” Ideal for the young souls, the gift will teach them everything about their heritage, and provide them with quality learning. You’ll be thrilled to know that your gift will be ensuring Jewish integrity, Jewish identity and a Jewish future.

10 Make a splash with our timeless “Family Purity Gift for the Married Soul.” This Divinely inspired gift allows you to make the most of your marriage, bringing you and your spouse to new, undiscovered depths of intimacy. It brings a cherished sacredness into your personal, and soulful, relationship.

The Ten Perfect Gifts for Your Soul are available at over 3500 Chabad Center worldwide.

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